7 comments on “More Answers To Your Cop Questions

  1. I’ve been lurking for a couple of months – and thought I’d ask a question. My husband is an officer of roughly 3 years after training. He’s super about leaving the job at the job and I’ve been thrilled with the friendships he’s developed. The families of the officers, haven’t as of yet, met or anything along that line. We’ve had a close call week a month ago when two of our officers were shot. Luckily they both survived…but one was in the area my husband watches over. The fellow was on a different shift, so DH was unfamiliar with the officer. My question is this…how does a spouse adequately even approach supporting her husband emotionally if and when the time comes when it is his buddy?

  2. Tookshire, that is THE question for cops’ partners, isn’t it?

    Here is the best advice I can offer: Treat that moment (which I pray does not come) as you would any other tragedy in the house. If your husband is an “alone” mourner, then give him space. If he likes to snuggle and cry, then offer that.

    Also, please do not be insulted if he prefers to meet first with the other cops. We have this weird comraderie that sometimes only comes out in times of tragedy. Even as his wife, there might be a time when you “can’t understand.”

    MOST IMPORTANT: Please see that he (and you) get some professional help if the incident involves a death. Our profession has come so far in making this acceptable, not “sissy” as it was when I came on. PLEASE avail yourselves of the help. It can make all the difference.

    I hope this is of some assistance. And I hope you never have to use the advice.

  3. Hey.. thanks for the “answer to your cop questions” entries. I’d be nice if you posted the person’s question along with the answers!

    Some of them are obvious from your answers, but it’s still nice to have the question first, especially for those of us following along using the RSS feed (we don’t always look at comments).

    Keep up the good work, I enjoy your blog.
    ~trixie

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